Tonight (Saturday), while driving home listening to the song collection Sonbeams just released, my mind wandered to something beyond my control. The devil was trying to distract me, making me ‘worry’ about people that might buy the songs, and use them for other than their own personal use. (Free copying)

Sure, this is a legitimate concern when you have a product - copyright matters. But it’s not something I can control, I can only point out that it’s not to be done. From there, the Lord is the Judge and will take care of it. But I’ll admit, I was really struggling tonight.

Then the CD changed to the next disk, and the Lord used that to convict ME about where MY focus was. Funny how sometimes when you are trying to judge others, that God is able to turn the tables on you and judge you for something! The song that came up was - Be Thou My Vision - and the words that rung true in my heart were “naught be all else to me SAVE THAT THOU ART”.

What is my vision? Is my vision the Lord, and living/ serving in a way which will further HIS kingdom? Is everything else naught (nothing) to me next to Him?

There will always be something I can worry about, something I can get upset about - but what does that accomplish? For the most part, nothing! It gets me upset, but that’s about it, because I can’t control other people and their words/ attitudes/ or actions.

But if GOD is my vision, if HE is the ONE my focus is on, I can leave my worries and concerns with Him and HE will take care of things and others. While this isn’t soaking in Scripture verses exactly, the Lord used this beautiful old hymn to speak to me tonight.

Read the words, sing them if you are familiar with the song, and make the Lord your vision today. 

Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee, Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle-shield, sword for my fight,
Be Thou my dignity, Thou my delight.
Thou my soul’s shelter, Thou my high tower.
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of heaven, my victory won,
May I reach heaven’s joys, O bright heav’ns Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my vision, O ruler of all.

Whatever might ‘befall’ you today, pray that HE will still be your vision, He’s the ruler of all!

Exodus 20:16 - “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.”

Bearing false witness - we are not supposed to lie about our neighbor, say anything ‘untrue’ - even if it seems too small to be a lie, to say something misleading about one another.

See yourself in a courtroom - you have placed your hand on the Bible and sworn to tell the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. God is the Honorable Judge, listening closely to every word of your testimony. Okay, NOW say what it is you were about to say about your neighbor/ friend/ family member/ church leader.

OOOHHHHH!! Kinda changes the way you might talk, huh? In a courtroom, false witness is a serious offense - a crime. The judge and jury don’t look favorably on it at all.

Why then in life do we not see it as serious - because it is, if not even MORE SO!!

We, as ladies, must also be careful that in talking we don’t give way to gossip and slander. Even what might be sharing our frustrations or dislikes about someone can lead to ‘bearing false witness’. It’s easy to get caught up in gossip, and say things as facts that are really just opinions.

The best rule of thumb in regards to talking though, is - If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all. (Gotta love Thumper in Bambi!!)

Keeping it brief, after a long night of pain, sweats, chills - and lying in bed this morning, it came to me… Have I myself taken the time to REALLY pray about this kidney stone? I’ve asked others to pray for me, and subconsciously prayed, but hadn’t stopped and verbally handed this to the Lord myself.

So as I was lying down around 11:00 or so this morning, pain getting worse again, I prayed - acknowledging that GOD created my body. I gave Him my kidneys, and prayed that He would intervene and heal them - crushing the stone, making it disappear, or something.

I awakened at 12:30′ish to a pretty strong contraction. After lying in bed a while, I got up to potty, and much to my surprise - there it was! (or they were)

Thank you Lord for allowing these to pass from me!! I’ve still had many smaller pieces throughout the afternoon continue to pass, and am still pretty tired and sore from the whole 3 day ordeal. BUT, I wanted to thank you all for your emails and prayers, and give GOD the glory for passing these from me!

This week’s Messy Monday - well, I’m taking a break.

Candace

As much as I would like to change today’s topic, it’s something the Lord just hasn’t let out of my mind ALL week! While I would normally prefer to keep Sunday’s as encouraging and uplifting - THIS is where the Lord has had me - and I feel led to share.

It’s long - sorry!! I try to be brief, really I do. But as I wrote in my post the other day, this is also a journal for me, and my daughter(s) one day. This is an important lesson that God is teaching me right now, and I want my little girl to know how the Lord has worked in my life!

In our church service last week, one of the men got up and read a verse. At the time, I was struggling with little ones, trying to keep them quiet and still, so I only heard (in a deep sense) part of what he said. His point was that we weren’t supposed to speak evil of anyone! It stayed in my mind, but then as I was reading through some of the great blogs on the Ultimate Blog Party list (picking out “Sister” sites), I came across the verse again!

What struck me Sunday, at that time, was when he mentioned that we aren’t even supposed to speak evil of our leaders - even if they are not in line with our beliefs! Sure, there’s always something I can find to say negative about the decisions being made in our state and country - but is that what God says I should do? He then continued on to share how we’re aren’t supposed to speak evil of ANYONE, in gossip or using prayer requests to ’share’ our thoughts.

Well, while there’s more than one verse… We were on Acts 23 - I’m sharing several.

Psalms 34:13 - “Keep thy tongue from evil, and thy lips from speaking guile.”

 Hmmm… this verse doesn’t give room for sometimes speaking evil. How many times this week have I spoken ‘evil’ of DH’s boss - hubby isn’t allowed any time off before the baby to help give me a break….

Thankfully, the Lord DOES keep bringing to mind that I shouldn’t be complaining about all the time DH is gone working, but should be GRATEFUL that he has a job and is willing to work to support our family!

Acts 23:5 - “Then said Paul, I wist not, brethren, that he was the high priest: for it is written, Thou shalt not speak evil of the ruler of thy people.

For it is written! This means that GOD said it in the Bible! It’s not something that we can pick and choose depending on if we agree with who our rulers are, or if we agree with them.

So what do we do with all the frustrations we have towards ‘bad’ rulers? We are to bring them before the Lord - interceding in prayer. Remember the verse about the Lord being able to change hearts?

God has ALLOWED the rulers we have - yes, you read right - GOD Himself has all authority, and no one has authority except God gives it to them. While we might not understand, it’s all a part of God’s plan. Looking at it this way, when we speak evil of rulers, we are not only criticizing them, but God and His plan! Ouch!

Ephesians 4:31 - “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.”

Put it away! Remember the verse (paraphrased) - “Whatsoever things are lovely… pure… of good report - if there be any virtue, any praise - think on these things. If we are speaking in bitterness and anger, evil of another - are we following these verses?

What does it profit when our hearts are full of anger and bitterness - except degrade others and make us angrier and more bitter? Really, I struggle with this at times still. There are times when I get upset by others, and thankfully the Lord takes those times from me quickly - though sometimes lasting several days to a week.

Honestly, I’m miserable during that time. My heart isn’t focused on the Lord, my eyes aren’t on Him. I’m full of resentment, my mind racing to ‘how I can get them’. It’s taken YEARS for me to finally grow enough that the Lord allows me to use self-control to avoid things that I would later regret. Not to say I don’t still falter at times though - I’m not perfect!

But even this week, it came to my attention that something I had spoken to DH about YEARS and YEARS ago in anger and hurt, STILL is in his mind today! I cannot tell you how this broke my heart when he shared this with me, I was crying inside, until I made it to the bathroom to really cry.

While the statement from the past WAS true, it was full of anger and bitterness, and had deeply hurt my husband. The Lord was gracious to begin to restore this - as we stayed up late into the night sharing with one another our feelings.

It wasn’t an easy conversation - for either of us - but it was such a blessing. For a long time, I felt like I didn’t matter to him at times, only to now find out it was because of a few words that I had spoken. I was able to share with him how I’ve felt, but also that I completely understood where he was coming from. I now have a lot of effort to put into restoring that hurt in his heart.

BUT - the good news - my husband is SO much like the Lord now. Where at one time he would’ve gotten angry, closed his ears and heart - he now is caring and sensitive to my needs as well. He was able to share his feelings of hurt, but still be there just to hold me and let me cry. This has been the biggest blessing in our marriage - seeing the Lord change who he was into a man of Godly character. He truly treats me as himself - esteeming others higher than himself.

Okay - long, but I had to share!!

James 4:11- “Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge.”

This is the verse to be careful of! I can see 100% where the man Sunday was coming from - regarding gossip and using a ‘prayer request’ as a way of getting around this verse. Are we placing ourselves in a PERFECT light while degrading others? There are NO times that it is acceptable to speak evil of and judge another’s works, words, or actions.

BUT, this is where the Christian faith seems tricky to me - and feel free to share if you disagree!! I’m open to learning!!

We are NOT to judge - we are not to say something as fact about someone when we don’t know their true motives/ hearts/ actions. Basically, we aren’t supposed to give our opinions and personal feelings of others in a condemning way.

Now, there are times in our faith when we aren’t to close our eyes to sin either! We must be wise as serpents, and not allow evil in our homes or near us. Not that ‘people’ are evil, but there is evil work. We are in a SPIRITUAL battle - against the ruler of evil and darkness - and can NOT disregard or take lightly the methods of deceit he uses.

I don’t believe we are to go out and publicly put down every bad thing we see in people - no! That’s what all of the above is about. But when something poses a danger to someone - either physically or emotionally - I don’t believe we are to keep our mouths completely shut either.

If someone is going to be in the path of a rapist - would you not alert them? If you knew someone to have problems in certain areas that would affect the safety or spiritual life of another - would you not need to advise others ‘briefly’ of your concerns? I personally believe so - but only in these type circumstances.

One point I would encourage is to still not ‘label or judge’ actions - because there’s no way to prove what another’s heart is - only God can do that. But instead, we are to give Godly counsel, and in a manner that doesn’t involve anger/ bitterness/ resentment. God knows our motives and hearts - He sees all and knows all. He can see past our little sneaky ways (yes, we are ALL sneaky!!), and knows whether the words we speak are in love, or anger and evil. He knows if we are judgmental and condemning. He also holds us accountable for what we Do or Do Not say!

An unexpected turn of events landed me in the hospital on Thursday, which I’ve posted about here: http://ninemonthsorless.com/blog/?p=57. I am VERY tired and sore, so will probably be off of the computer more than on over the next few days.

We would greatly appreicate your prayers!

Candace

For anyone that might’ve read the Ten Commandments post early Thursday morning, the Lord did place in my heart something to add. Something that applies to the unmarried - whether young or old! Please take the time to read what He burdened me to share with you - for someone that might need a little encouragement, if not for yourself….

Wanted: Dead or Alive hd

Exodus 20:15 - “Thou shalt not steal.”

To steal: to take something that isn’t yours, to take without asking, to take without permission.

This commandment seems fairly simple when I think of it in general terms. First thoughts being that we aren’t to steal things from stores, people, or homes. We aren’t supposed to be thieves.

But when I really think about it, it’s more than stealing what our law enforces. I don’t believe God means you can’t steal some things and leave out others.

Meaning, do we ’steal’ time? Do we ’steal’ thoughts? Do we ’steal’ a look at something?

I’m guilty of stealing time - in that there are times that I take time away from the role God has placed me in to do things that “I” want to do (whether being on the computer, talking on the phone, etc). By doing this, I’m stealing time that I could/ should be serving Him. Time is taken from my husband, from my children.

Many churches pressure you to always be participating in programs at church, but if these are taking away from our families, are we not stealing from them? (Not that all church functions are wrong!!)

Stealing thoughts - Especially for women in the workplace, there are times when your male co-workers might seem ‘perfect’ in your eyes. This could be more likely if you are in a marriage that isn’t so perfect! Sadly, I speak from experience.

While I never ‘did’ anything unprofessional, I did ’steal’ thoughts of how great this guy was, and why couldn’t DH be more like him. As I’ve said before, I am SO grateful that God allowed me to leave the workplace and focus SOLELY on my husband!! I have such a great love for him, and am still saddened for that period of time where I was in a place that ’stole away’ what God would’ve had me be.

And stealing looks - I’m not so sure this is so much a female thing, but I’m not out much - so I guess it could be and I’m just naive. As wives, it’s wrong to ’steal a look’ at another guy passing by, or for that matter, even for a single girl. God has ONE person for us, and even if we haven’t found them yet, we still need to keep ourselves 100% pure for them - in heart, mind, and body.

By stealing looks, you are flirting with temptation in your mind. And as we read last week from James 1, temptation leads to sin, and sin to death.

For unmarried folk - be careful not to ’steal’ away something from another that you might be courting/ dating. This applies to things as small as even holding hands, a kiss, hugs, rubbing someone’s shoulders or back. Why would this matter?

Well, if you were married, would you want your partner to do any of these things with someone else? NO! So why is BEFORE marriage any different than AFTER marriage - if you truly desire to please the Lord and present yourself a pure bride/ groom to your mate? It’s no different at all!

When you share these very personal matters with someone that 1) you have no intention on marrying or 2) will end up not marrying, you are stealing away something that belongs to that person AND THEIR FUTURE SPOUSE!

I grew up knowing that I only wanted to be with one person, and thankfully my husband is the only man I’ve ever loved, ever kissed, ever embraced. I am SO grateful to the Lord for that.

But I do constantly have to struggle knowing that he HAS shared these things with others in his past - which he regrets deeply. When our children aren’t taught that marriage is sacred and you should prepare yourself from an early age, they begin flirting in relationships - thinking it’s just the thing to do.

They don’t give any thought to a future mate, and how their actions might affect them. Some DO scoff at me, but to be honest, that doesn’t matter. I am not, and never will be happy that my husband has kissed someone else.

That’s something that was stolen from me, something I will NEVER get from him - his first kiss. And that’s a lot for someone that saved her’s for him. As mothers, begin teaching your children early on to protect themselves - mentally and physically, no matter how small of matter - from theives that would steal something from them and their future spouse.

At the moment, I feel very convicted about time that I have ’stolen’ from my husband and children. But have placed myself into a commitment that I must honor. Thankfully, this commitment will be over within 3 weeks at the most.

It’s not that I don’t enjoy my time there, but it’s made my children and husband pay a high price - for which I am sorry. Yes, I had DH’s approval, but I know this has been a hard time for him.

Whether you are a wife, mother, or still single - as you meditate on this verse, ask God to reveal areas in your life that you are ’stealing’ away from Him, from a husband, or from children. Don’t be resentful or defensive, but allow Him to take these areas and turn them back to serving HIM in the role He has for you.

I just signed a petition from Focus on the Family Action to stop the new effort to funnel our tax dollars to fund abortions and organizations that provide abortion, both in the United States and abroad.

Focus Action wants to deliver petitions to Congress before the upcoming votes on the appropriations bills. Please go here to sign and be represented in this important effort:

http://www.focuspetitions.com/185/petition.asp?PID=19754353&NID=1

As I’m approaching the end of my pregnancy, I am finding myself a little more tired. While I won’t cut out posts altogether, I must do this some in order to finish last minute preparations and hopefully have a lot more extra time to spend lovin’ on my little ones before my attention will be going to a new baby.

This said, please forgive my lack of a “Soak in the Word” post this weekend. We’ve been pulling out baby clothes - washing them and baby accessories this weekend - FUN!

This “Messy Monday” for me will include at least 3 loads of laundry - no mind that I did 4 or 5 yesterday! I’m finding that with 3 active youngsters we’re going through a LOT of clothes.

We’ve been reading through the Little House books lately, and near the beginning of the first book, they talked about certain chores they did each day of the week.

While I’ve always kinda fell into the same routine as far as laundry is concerned, it’s fallen by the wayside the past few weeks. I have noticed over the past month that we’ll never be a one day a week laundry family for a LONG time! (Especially since I’m hoping to cloth diaper this time)

I know at least for the 7.5 weeks, then time after the baby is born, I won’t even be a two-days-a-week washer. Call me lazy, but I’m not too fond of squatting down to load and unload the washer 4 times a day/ 2 times a week. So, my goal will be to do 1 or 2 loads of laundry at least 3 to 4 times a week.

This is managable - which is KEY for me. DD is usually more than willing to help me load/ unload - even folding the washclothes for me. I really need to take advantage of her willing spirit, one to help myself in the next month or two, and two - to develop a servant’s spirit in her.

This weekend, DH took the children outside to play for a while. I took advantage of the time to pick up a little. After a while, DD came in. It didn’t hit me right away, but she went straight to her room to play by herself. I felt sad that her she was all alone (though I’m sure she enjoys time away from two brothers a little), so I asked her to help me.

I couldn’t believe HOW excited and willing she was! “SURE!!”, was her excited response. We had a wonderful time working together on laundry. While she didn’t last the whole laundry time, I was grateful we had the learning time together that we did.

So, for pregnant moms, this week I’d have to suggest - do what’s managable! You have to learn to pace yourself at some point, and know when to rest. I personally can’t tackle the monsterous load of laundry that multiples in our sleep.

But for wives and mothers in general, depending on the size of your family/ laundry load - I’d suggest having one or two days set aside JUST for laundry. It’s easier to get in the swing of things - getting them washed/ dried/ put away if you do it altogether. Also, it’s more economical to use the dryer while it’s still hot.

What tips might you have that work great for you and your family? We’d love to have you share them!

PS - I will continue with the Ten Commandment series through the end, with one other post a week - Candace

Exodus 20:14 - “Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

Don’t even get me started on this one! Our society today has become so immune to immoral dress and actions that even the church is on a slippery downward path. Just take a look at what girls and women are actually wearing to church these days! Short skirts, pants, tight sweaters, low cut tops….

“Thou shalt not commit adultery”. Easy enough, so it seems - just don’t get involved in an impure relationship with someone else’s spouse.

But what does Jesus say in Matthew 5:28-30?

“But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”

And 1 Corinthians 7:1 - “It is good for a man not to touch a woman.”

Now, I take these very literally - God only says what He means - He doesn’t give us options. Eyes should not even look at ANYTHING that cause lust, and NO physical contact should be made. These might seem harmless enough, but I have talked with enough people to KNOW for a fact that there is nothing innocent ‘for at least one party’.

So while I myself haven’t ever had a martial relationship with anyone other than my husband, have I ever dressed in a way to cause men to lust? Actually, for a brief time in my life - I did.

To be 100% truthful, I was tired of being the odd ball; feeling like people were snickering at me behind my back. No offense meant in what I’m saying, but this is what I felt. I was tired of long dresses, unattractive clothes, long plain hair. I wanted to be pretty, to fit in with other girls.

I guess you could say that I found that place, and sure, it was fun. But now looking back, I wish I hadn’t comprised so many of my standards. While I don’t feel it was necessary to be as ‘plain’ as I was, I went too far the other direction.

I look back at pictures from when my husband and I were dating / first married and cringe. Even pictures from our honeymoon - and asking DH why in the world he let me go out in public like that! And really, what I consider to be short shorts are practically past my knees compared to what I see young girls wearing today. (Mine weren’t past my knees - just an expression…)

Spaghetti strap tops… plenty of skin exposed there - definitely enough to catch a man’s attention ‘in the wrong way’. So true, while I’ve been faithful to my husband, I wasn’t dressing that way. And if it’s adultery for a man to look at and lust after a woman, wouldn’t this woman be guilty too - since she’s the one that enticed him to lust?

I’m very thankful that early in our marriage the Lord began to restore me in the ‘modesty’ area. I still wear shorts and pants, more often than not - my husband prefers that. But I DO pay attention to how these fit. I have to ask myself if I’d be comfortable wearing this walking down a street full of men.. knowing they were watching..

Would the way I’m dressed cause them to think of me as modest and a lady, or someone they can do with as they please in their minds? Even when I’m dressed well, I still prefer for DH to walk behind me at times - just because I can spot these kind of men easily, and feel very uneasy around them.

Okay, “not to even touch a woman”. This is one thing that has really bothered me in churches today. Churches encouraging hugging between men and women. Even youth groups! And not just side hugs - but front ones - chest to chest! I remember at two different churches an activity in which the group was divided in half.

One half standing with their eyes closed, the other group walking up and embracing them for as long as they desired. I won’t say that some people aren’t truly sincere, but don’t tell me that there’s not some guys out there that really enjoy the FREE, ENCOURAGED invitation to hold close someone they wouldn’t otherwise embrace. I seriously doubt it’s the “Love of Christ” that they are feeling towards certain ladies.

Before some of you jump all over me, notice I said SOME!!

I’m sorry, but this has really bothered me for many years. I couldn’t believe that at one church DH and I attended years ago, they had this activity DURING the church service. And what was more shocking?? DH and I were the ONLY ones that remained seated in the pew, not participating.

For one, it was humilating - making us look like the bad ones, but yet we couldn’t get up and leave either.

But I could say for certain that there were certain young ladies in that service that …

1) I didn’t want hugging on my husband

AND

2) I didn’t want my husband hugging on!

Church, we must be aware of subtle deceit - we are being blinded, and ever so slowly we are beginning to follow the world instead of God.

It is GOD in his Word that has said these things, not my own interpretation! Someone commented a while back about me being ‘too much’ in regards to not watching football - but really, I’m happy to be called ‘too much’ if I’m following in obedience to God’s Word!

If DH says that seeing girls dressed in tight or skimpy clothes can trigger wrong thoughts - I believe him. If he turns it off - I’m more proud than ever of him. For one, he’s heeding the Lord speaking to his spirit, and two, he’s respecting me and our marriage.

I know of one mom that justifies sending her son Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issues, just because ‘guys like that kind of thing’. Well of course they do!! But it’s not because it’s bringing them into a closer walk with the Lord. It’s quite the opposite! Lust, when entertained, brings forth what?? SIN! (James 1:14-15)

As we examine ourselves in light of these verses, let those of us which are mothers also carefully evaluate our children  - what we teach them from an early age, and their actions and dress. Begin teaching your children early on what sin is - to flee from it, not to allow ‘just a little’ because it’s (so called) innocent enough.

When it comes to sin and lust, nothing is innocent enough. God has spoken clearly, are we listening?

As a wife, I to also evaluate mail I received. There’s a very well known lingerie chain that gives you a discount for using their credit card - so as a saver, of course I had signed up. This put me on their mailing list, which I wasn’t aware of.

First, I was embarrassed that the mailman had such indecent material put before his eyes - because of me! I know there are thousands of these mags out there, but I was adding one more temptation to stumble. And then what about DH?

If he happened to get the mail, here was some barely dressed female flaunting her body before his eyes! Don’t tell me this won’t cause even a twinge of temptation in a man’s mind! Needless to say, I called and explained how I didn’t want indecent material being mailed to my home. It wasn’t proper, there was no reason for the pictures in there. Were these pics really for females to help make their decisions??

I know this is long - I said not to get me started! Let me leave you with the verses I just mentioned above, James 1:14-16.

“But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. Do not err, my beloved brethren.”